December 18, 2009
December 1, 2009
It’s World AIDS Day
I got pulled into this back in ’83. I was forced to watch friends and co-workers die agonizing deaths. There was no way in Hell I could just idly watch the drama. I was with almost 200 boys as they drew their last breaths. Often I was the only one there. I cleaned their homes and cooked them food. Worked on the original AIDS Quilt so they would not be forgotten.
Some of those folks I didn’t agree with, but the right, the Human Thing, was to help in every way possible.
The World has blood on it’s hands. They stood on the sidelines as this disaster unfolded, mainly due to religious and Racial bias. The U.S. has played a huge part in that crime. This country could have moved faster to help those affected by HIV, but it didn’t because it was about “those people”.
In ’92 I found out that I was one of “those people”. I had been raped in ’84. That day the battle for those with HIV became personal. I’m now at my third trip to AIDSLand, and I will not die from it. I refuse to let the demon win, but that’s me and all that I believe in.
Many do not have my resources or strength. I have been to the Abyss more than a few times… I have no fear of dying. I have my love in Living . That keeps me going.
I have many issues that I feel strongly about, but this one is at the fore. It’s not about me; I have lived far more of Life than many will ever know. I fight because I can for those who can’t.
In ’94 a dear friend, hours before he died, told me that I had to keep going. He had “Seen” that I had to keep going. Later that day I opened the “Doors” because I knew what was happening. He passed and all is well. He is in the Summer Country resting up for his next turn of the Wheel.
We must find a way to defeat this disease. Not for me (I can live with it) but for the ones to come. They should never know the pain and sorrow of this thing.
And to everyone, “Welcome to World AIDS Day”.
November 30, 2009
November 18, 2009
Third Annual RampART Festival!
Here’s great festival for this Saturday in New Orleans: RampArt Festival. Crafts, food, art, music and more. It’s being held in Armstrong Park (Rampart & Dumaine) from 11AM to 5PM. It’s also free.
November 16, 2009
And I Am To Vanish Into the Mists?
back in time there was a child, a freak of nature, though that child never knew the truth. A child who walked to school, studied hard and one that fulfilled the wishes of it’s parents; to be the best that you can be and never forget where you came from. The child who held their Mom as she died very early and a Dad that lost it because his world had ended. The child who became a “Mom”. A child who did everything to please…who had a goal in mind; “Evey chance for everyone”. The child thought, “I leave no one behind”.
That child wound up being the Class Valedictorian as it worked full-time to keep it’s world and the family safe, rated by the Military and many colleges as a prime choice- 200+ IQ and being part of the one hundreth of one percentile of the entire population. “There is nothing you can’t do.” they said. “The World is your oyster”. And that child turned down their Dad’s second mortgage to finance that child’s college fees because the child was worried about their siblings’ chances to be able to further themselves. That child did not want preferential treatment. The child knew what it was directed to do, what the Inner Voice called for.
That child went into Nuclear Engineering in the Navy, loving the calculations and the whole process, but after 9 years left for something different. The child decided to deal with people instead of equations, since people were what the child wanted to be involved with. It’s what the child needed in it’s soul. Connections with others was what that child craved, needed, and desired.
Yes, the child is me.
I’m an Intersexed woman with a healthy dose of Aspergers Syndrome to boot. And all I have ever wanted was to tend my own garden and see folks living happy lives. Sadly, that was never to be my fate. I have seen too much.I must speak from my heart and speak for those like me.
And I must live by the words of the Lady.
And no, She will not lend her mind to their crap; My belief and trust is in people. “Such a waste”, said my in-laws… “You could make so much money”. My answer was about how does money asauge the pain others are going through, the drive for true equality, the knowledge that you have a part in all of this?
My answer was that it didn’t.I don’t agree with the “$$$=Success” model. My sisters and brothers need folks like me. Our city needs those like me.We are the Guardians. Not the Watchers, but those who defend. Not Warriors, but Healers.
Welcome to the new World. “I AM” is the most important statement one can make about their life. That’s the moment you “Become”.
And yes the World is my oyster and I will not vanish into the Mists.
November 10, 2009
What Being “OUT” Really Means-
9/21/01… that was the day I stared at my shotgun barrel and was thinking of pulling the trigger. Then a voice rang out in my home saying, “You have much more to do”.
I’ve written about this over the years, so I’m not going to repeat it all here
That day I “Outed” myself. Yes I had done many protests over the years for different issues, but that day I had to declare who I am and what I stood for, what I believed in.
When I say “Believe”, I mean you must own it to the very core of your soul. What you are and what you are not. How you see the World and what you think about things going down. You become a participant and no longer can be just a bystander.
That’s the day when you become Real. “Hey there! I’m fuckin’ alive and living here and I don’t like the shit going down”. That is the day you truly join the Dance, the time that you can begin to use the power that you were gifted from the One. It also means you are responsible for that which goes down around you, in your sphere, your neighborhood, your life.
Yes, it sux, but it’s gotta be done.
The truth is that to realize oneself, you must strive to help others to come to that same place in Life. You may not agree with them, but that’s their Journey, not yours. You facilitate their growth even when they oppose your being. You become a helper, and the wierd thing is that they wind up embracing you because you cared. (and who says Life isn’t interesting?)
This message is not about Trans, but about all of us. When WE CARE about each other, the World works pretty good. When there is no care we wind up with the crap-pile of a World we all currently face. Our care, tears, laughter and pains drive this World, not the corporations.
We are Power and it’s far past time to use it.
Become yourself and grab hold of Life. “OUT” yourself.
November 8, 2009
House Health Care Bill Passes… Joe Cao (R-New Orleans) Only GOPer to vote for It!
The House’s version passed (not perfect, but it’s a start) and the GOP Rep for Orleans and much of Jefferson was the only one of his party to vote for it. I applaud his courage and desire to find ways to help his constituents to obtain health care.
Now if I can just convince him to become an Independent… I don’t trust Dems very much, and from what I see of the playing feild down here for Demos for the seat, he might very well be my choice next year. (That’s right… I am now no longer a Demo. I will vote independently of both parties for the most Progressive person possible)
November 6, 2009
Life Is Good
There’s gotta be some quakin’ and shakin’ at City Hall today.
How much longer will Ray Nagin be Mayor?