Gentilly Girl- a part of the 99%

May 9, 2010

My View of Spirit

Filed under: Aside — Morwen Madrigal @ 7:43 pm

(I have written extensively over the last many years. Sadly the Federal Flood and it’s ramifications caused me to lose all of those sites and all of the material stored there. I have been half of myself since then… it’s like writing a novel and losing it before you can type the final chapter. )

I have been asked many times about what I believe in. What makes me tick. How can I just walk into the middle of a crowd and let down my hair and speak of things most people would never reveal to others. Why do I feel that doing certain things are important, even if it could result in tons of pain. (and has done so)

It’s about what I “see”.

In the Beginning there was the One. It’s faceted like a jewel and the Light which comes from each facet has a different “frequency”. We are drawn, much like as moths to the flame, to the Light that resonates within us. (Atheists are included in this… I count on them to be a counter when I go too far)

I’m drawn to be a witch, a priestess of the oldest spiritual leanings of Humankind. I work within the realm of Earth, Water, Air and Fire. I can walk the Worlds and I must live by what I “See”. Much of my life is about magic: the changing of Reality in accordance with Will. The rest of that life is being thankful for each and every day and the people I run into.  I walk the Path and every step is a new experience. (not that all experiences are pleasurable)

I don’t ascribe to the rules of religions… I see them as money machines. The only currency that means anything to me is devotion and trust. What do you believe about “living”. How do you represent yourself day-to-day and how much you help another. This is that “something to believe in” that many folk seek.

It can, and will, consume you. One can become a hermit, but being holy on a mountain is not as effective as walking down the streets and interacting with others. (my girls back in S.F. convinced me of that years ago: I must remain in the Real World) It is not always easy. I cannot change a person’s mind. Situations can be altered, but the mindset is theirs.

All I can do is “BE”.

And maybe, just maybe, I can change hearts, mind and souls.

There are certain aspects of my workings: I can be Bride (the Mother), or I can become Arianrhod (the Changer) and also the Nataraja (the Dancer on the Abyss).  Mostly I am just Morwen who walks the days and just deals with the poop of Life.

And when it’s time for me to go, “And when I die, when I’m dead and gone… there will one more child to carry on”). Big or small, I will have made a change. I will pass to the Summer Country happily and the Goddess will tell me I did good. I will rest and get ready for the next trip on the Wheel.

Yes, I will be back.

February 9, 2010

It Sux When One Is Surrounded By Wonders and You are Cursed

Filed under: Aside,New Orleans — Morwen Madrigal @ 7:06 pm

Sunday the 31st Betts and I went to the skating rink.  Had our new skates that were meant for action and finesse… was going to be fun.  Turned out that the rink was way too slick for my wheels, so I just sat and watched Betts do her thing. He was having fun and getting her old skills back.  It was also Family Night, and since I hadn’t skated for 40 years I didn’t want to risk getting whiped out by kids zooming around whilst getting used to breaking in professional skates. (I was expecting a wooden rink, not a polished paint slab type).

We were about to leave some I headed to the ladies room hittting apiece of pizza lating in some til.Up in the air I went landing on my left hip.  Blinding pain ensued and I couldn’t stand up. Leg was fine but it was if there was no support for my body.  I was wheelchaired to the car and we headed back to New Orleans and home.

Halfway across the River I told Betts to take me to Tulane’s ER. I had a bad feeling that something major was wrong. Two hours later the verdict was I: I had two breaks in my hip bone. Surgery went down in the morning .A  plate and three screws were holding it all together just below the part of the femur that fits into the pelvic socket. They said all looked good and they helped me go back to sleep.

Sometime afterward they changed my medications, ones that I had told them my my body reacted badly to. When I woke up treatment continued, but the chages weren’t told to me.  My body started going hatwire and my mind turned into mush. I looked healthy when I entered the place but was turning into a zombie. That’ when Betts stepped in and forced them to change the meds back to what was originally agreed upon. Two days later I started to get back to normal. What should have been a three day stay turned into an eight day Hell.

I missed the Mayoral elections, Missed the build-up to the Super Bowl, but did come around enough to what our Saints win the  game. The next day Betts got me out of there when we learned they were thinking of shipping me to Houston for Rehab. In those last two days I learned to use a walker properly allby myself. Figured out how to do Life things differently in order to function. I got home last night tired, but relieved..

I missed all the fun and joy of what turned out to be three of the best days our city has had since the Flood just because someone over-rode my knowledge of my body and my history of medication use.  I know things happened, but I was outside looking in. Physically I couldn’t have been a part of the fun, but I was also prevented from emotionally enjoying any of it.  The former is understandable, the latter is unforgivable.

The body will heal in time.  My mind will slowly come out of the fog s. The denial of the joy of it all will never heal.

November 10, 2009

What Being “OUT” Really Means-

Filed under: Aside — Morwen Madrigal @ 5:15 pm

9/21/01… that was the day I stared at my shotgun barrel and was thinking of pulling the trigger. Then a voice rang out in my home saying, “You have much more to do”.

I’ve written about this over the years, so I’m not going to repeat it all here

That day I “Outed” myself. Yes I had done many protests over the years for different issues, but that day I had to declare who I am and what I stood for, what I believed in.

When I say “Believe”, I mean you must own it to the very core of your soul. What you are and what you are not. How you see the World and what you think about things going down. You become a participant and no longer can be just a bystander.

That’s the day when you become Real. “Hey there! I’m fuckin’ alive and living here and I don’t like the shit going down”. That is the day you truly join the Dance, the time that you can begin to use the power that you were gifted from the One. It also means you are responsible for that which goes down around you, in your sphere, your neighborhood, your life.

Yes, it sux, but it’s gotta be done.

The truth is that to realize oneself, you must strive to help others to come to that same place in Life. You may not agree with them, but that’s their Journey, not yours. You facilitate their growth even when they oppose your being. You become a helper, and the wierd thing is that they wind up embracing you because you cared. (and who says Life isn’t interesting?)

This message is not about Trans, but about all of us. When WE CARE about each other, the World works pretty good. When there is no care we wind up with the crap-pile of a World we all currently face. Our care, tears, laughter and pains drive this World, not the corporations.

We are Power and it’s far past time to use it.

Become yourself and grab hold of Life. “OUT” yourself.

February 23, 2009

Back In The Saddle

Filed under: Aside — Morwen Madrigal @ 2:47 pm

Yes it’s Lundi Gras and I have missed all of Carnival. As long as it goes down, I’m a happy girl.

Here’s Grand Funk Railroad doing one of my favs.

Yes Darlin’s, my pirate ship still sails and Her flags fly.  The owl and crossbones will always fly.

February 20, 2009

One Toke Over the Line

Filed under: Aside,Louisiana — Morwen Madrigal @ 12:55 pm

I didn’t notice what the folks in Massachusetts voted on last November, but it pleases me greatly. As one of the mommies of the Medical Maryjane Movement any form of decriminalization for pot possession is high on my list.

I do find it interesting that local police forces are trying to find ways to increase the fines for possession. Guess they are just like NOPD in that they would rather issue a ticket to a Gentle Freak instead of going after armed murderers.

In 2010 I will go after this for the Gret Stet. (Going o get screwed for this)

December 31, 2008

Happy New Year!

Filed under: Aside — Morwen Madrigal @ 7:01 pm

Have a good time tonight folks. Be safe, have fun and don’t drink the bars dry… I may want to visit them later. (and there will be no potable deliveries tomorrow.)

December 19, 2008

Ahh the Hostlidays…

Filed under: Aside,NOLA Bloggers — Morwen Madrigal @ 3:49 pm

Liprap turned me onto this. She didn’t want to post it on her site because of the horror.

Me? I’m just a sick, twisted bitch. I’m going to post it.

For the Nola Bloggers Hostilidays.

There you go Adrastos… Lippy turned me on to this video and I’ve now published in online.  Liprap and I can share the Hostilidays award.


December 18, 2008

Damn! This Could Get Me In Trouble.

Filed under: Aside — Morwen Madrigal @ 6:44 pm

Sushi on a naked woman. I’m freakin’ there.

Update- Got too exicted and forgot to provide the link.


December 13, 2008

Spare Me…

Filed under: Aside — Morwen Madrigal @ 7:56 pm

In my house the toilet seats sre down and so are the lids.

This Live Science article talks of the danger to little pinnies from toilet seats.

What the Hell is wrong with just sitting down on the pot? That way I I don’t have to clean the damn thing every day.

December 1, 2008

Limited Blogging

Filed under: Aside — Morwen Madrigal @ 4:33 am

Looks like my video card has pooped out, so that may mean I didn’t need a new tower two weeks ago. Hell, I have two systems now (Be very afraid). Betts is ordering a new SoundBlaster card and a video card for me tomorrow. Should be in Tuesday. If she’d order me another laptop I’d be in Geek Heaven, but finances are not in the right place for that.

I can’t take over her ‘puter during the day since she needs it for work (= $$$). I’ll try to keep up on things during the night.

On a health note, my prob has abated somewhat so I’m going to hang  on for my appointment on 12/15. Iron pills are helping with my loss of energy. I also need to assess my options since I am thourough when it comes to medical care (even though I do abuse my body… just me). I’m more scared of hospitals than I am of my habits.

The kind words from Gentle Readers have helped much on the health front- I won’t let ya’s down.

Now I must serve teh kittehs their canned food and find my bed. I have a date with some blankets.

Be Blessed!

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